BEXHILL SCHOOL

Taking a position

 

I had just had an uncomfortable meeting with Mr Desmond's cane - six of the best for poor end-of-week test results. I found Susie, Jennie, and Augusta in the Common Room. After inspecting my stripes and doling out the obligatory sympathy, they asked me how he'd beaten me. 

"On the bum, with a cane! What do you think?"

"No, we mean what position did make you adopt? Touching your toes? Hands on your knees? Over his desk?"

"Oh, I see. Actually, he made me kneel on my chair and stick my feet through the back while I lay over my desk. He yanked up my knickers really tight, so it was as good as getting it on the bare. Bit weird, really."

"You think that was weird!" exclaimed Susie. "Last time Mr Desmond whacked me he made me lie on a table, pull my knickers down and lift up my skirt. At least I guess my private parts weren't exposed, but he gave me an extra stroke each time I clenched my bum." 

"That's nothing," Augusta chimed in. "When I got twelve from the Deputy Head for using the 'F' word in front of some prospective parents, he made me lie over a stool with my feet up on small table. And he gave me two extra for having dirty socks."

"Well, I can trump you all," said Jennie, triumphantly. "I got done for cheeking Mr Samuels and he made me take off my skirt and knickers, and then I had to lie down on top of the desk with my head through the back of the chair. God knows what I must have looked like, but I suppose he enjoyed the view."

"That's the trouble with teachers today," said Augusta. "No sense of tradition. What's wrong with just grabbing your ankles?"

We all nodded in agreement.